The universe does not define my existence its rather me defining its vitality.


Appearance, Reality or Belief ?

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what you see,what is real or what you believe?

Appearance and Reality are two sides of the same coin. Perception is  what we see through our sensory organs and reality is ‘what is’ is actually there . However, there is another factor that I think forms our thinking that is ‘our believe’. Nature has its own way to connect to us, it only depends on us whether we want to be connected or not. 

Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder, or rather I would say beauty lies in the way we see ourselves . 

This tree is the  perfect reflection of our lives. The tree looks beautiful to a layman but its only that tree that know that is leaving are shedding. Just like we know that the time that is wasted is never going to come back. The leaves that are fallen will never be attached again. 

This moment is definitely sad and creates a picture of monotony  and sadness. However, in those low moments of life , when you’re trying to get it all figured and nothing works for out. What do you do ? 

Well, the tree stands tall, while a little boy instead of watching the fallen leaves, has his eyes glued a small bud on the last branch of tree. 

In the moment of dilemma, of appearance and reality, I guess ‘belief’ has a more significant role to play. 

There is always going to be a struggle and along with it, there is an emotion that coonects us truly and transparently.

‘’Belief’ is the meaning and the definition of our life. 

Blurred is perfect whereas the perfect doesn’t exist.

Often, we sit down to sort pictures to make sure our profiles have the perfect ones uploaded. Have you ever wondered about the blurred picture that you just rejected ?
Blurred is perfect whereas perfect doesn’t exist.
Looking at the blurred picture in front of me I realize its somehow just like my life .. All the dreams that I have right now, all the things that I long for, everything that I am working hard for its all ‘blur’
‘Blur’ by obstacles,hardships, commitments, and distant from where I stand.
There is a reason I think blur is perfect because a perfect picture would be too boring,too clear, too acceptable also.
Blurred pictures are like the eccentric opinions that were once unacceptable.
I know a certain life is better than an uncertain one but isn’t the uncertainty that is adventurous.
The more distant your dreams seem to be, the more times you fail, the more haze that get surrounded around you, the more blur it gets with every passing second, all these emotions indicate the fact that you are near or if not near, then you have come long way and the other half awaits you.
Its always the other side of the road that seems unclear because of the fog round around you but the blurred vision shows you’re walking on that road and everything that you long for is very near ..

‘Nature has its own way to talk, make sure you’re hearing’

#Because You Matter

021Being a part of one of the best institution in India brings me pride as well as responsibility. Where, every second person you come across is a legend or has created a unique path.

Where everything not just brings an amazing opportunity to do wonders but also peer pressure and competition. Highlighted, are those names that have brought honor to name of L.S.R. In the magic of L.S.R, lots of voices go unheard, a lot of people go unnoticed but not anymore.

‘BECAUSE YOU MATTER’ an amazing campaign started by the students of this institution. It’s not always about gaining popularity or being the eye candy. Sometimes ,we go through the worse in life and end up taking decisions that can never be changed. There is no path that leads you back home.

While all of us are chained in the blues of the metro city, I came across this board with so many messages . I did try and commit suicide once in my life too. I know it was the  most immature decision I took at that point of life but I wish I had come across one message of such a kind and maybe I wouldn’t  have  taken such a step.

Life isn’t easy and giving sympathy is an easier job because not all of us can always empathize with the pain of the person. Being a writer I believe words are magical, they have the eternal power to bring a change in this world. Everything I believed in given meaning with  these messages by anonymous people.

Let the shadows of the dark not haunt you rather the warmth of the sun make you smile. This is because you matter. Suicide is a solution to end misery but it’s not the only solution. I know that moment when you feel all your life is  vain, everything is ruined and there is no point of living the next moment. That’s how I felt but here I am content with life. After the failed suicide attempt it’s not that I realized the meaning of life or so on . It’s just that I decide to survive the odds. The survival wasn’t easy I had really rough patch for few months and now when I sit down talk about it  after years I guess I just end up smiling and say it  to myself “I was so insane”.

Life is beautiful and so are you, the wind may be harsh but the soft breeze is going to come  and this will happen  because you matter.

I know how it feels the moment you decide to end life and deep down you know it’s all going to fine. I still bear that scar, the stitches did hurt for sometime but then it gradually stopped. It doesn’t pain anymore but the mark remains. Every time someone asks me “What’s that scar?” I make a fake story, a different story for different people. It’s not that I am ashamed of myself but the truth is I am ashamed of falling part in that weak moment. Today, looking upon that scar I just know one thing “I matter” and so do you.

Life has its odds be the survivor, not the victim and if ever in life you’re falling apart just remember

 ‘The universe doesn’t define my existence rather it’s me defining its vitality’


Shadow of the Dark Soul – Book Review

Source: Shadow of the Dark Soul – Book Review

Believe…Love…Feel Free

Often, I end up writing after observing people or nature but this one is unusual and true. Three words that sum up life completely.

It sums up life...

Believe in your dreams the moment you trust yourself and strive to make your dreams come true, nothing can stop you to go further in life. Well, that’s not it; I guess our lives would be pale and monotonous without ‘love’. Fall in love with your dreams, your partner, your friends because love makes you grow, a person who makes you a better person and believes in you at times when you lose control. Hold on to this person or this friend close. Being close doesn’t mean letting them lose their individuality, let them feel free.

This was my chronological thought but you can also see this the other way around. Fell free, step out of the cage where you have enclosed you emotions and feelings, fall in love, deep and strong and believe in it and it’s going to last forever.

I know my thoughts are too random but I guess I just evolved from the cliché of

Love…Live…Laugh’ to ‘Believe…Love…Feel Free’

A puppet of emotions …

download (1)I have come across so many people who end up telling me “It’s my life and no one can take a control over me “. Is that true? Most of the people are driven by desires and ambitions but what is that has always been constant in this journey of life?

“Emotions” Everything that we do is driven constantly driven by one source. It all lies in our emotions.

Then how come people portray themselves are free or the most common thing that I have ever heard has been “I am not meant to be caged “

Aren’t we already caged? Every psychological, behavioral or subjective response that we make is because of this nine letter word.  Everything that we do today is a subjective response that we make to chains of emotions.

Emotions have the power to control even the most basic actions that we perform. ‘Enthusiastic,’ ‘threatened’, ‘Furious’, ‘grief-stricken’, ‘Cheated’, ‘Thank full’ ,‘In love’. Read them randomly and the answer lies within you. Ever word you just read has significance in your life that is an action that came out of these emotions.

I have been constantly taking about actions. Let me talk about the simplest thing. Notice the way a person sits or stands. Folded arms means probably tensed, someone walking casually means happy about life in the present state or locked fingers probably meaning something is not right.

I know I might be mixing two concepts of psychology one that judges gestures and the other that specifically tries to deal with emotional psychologist. I am the last person to know in detail anything related to it.

All I want to put up today is emotions are very strong let them not take a toll over you completely. They can be vengeful. Let the power reside you and not in your emotions.

Don’t be a puppet of  emotions.

Stay Strong : : Stay Ahead

My once upon a time: paperboats


We all made them “once upon a time “. Isn’t it weird every instance or moment in our lives that happens there comes a point in the same lifespan when we quote it as “once upon a time…”
I know it sounds strange but it’s the truth. I realized this thing when I said “It’s raining outside” and this kid next to me said “Pitter patter rain drops “both of us meant the same thing. We were at the same spot but something was different that moment when she uttered those words for me they were my “once upon a time

Feeling nostalgic I sit down to write recalling my once upon a time. Paper boats I guess they were the most essential part of rains. With some or the other wish inscribed on them they were to sail. Looking at them sailing in the rain it felt like an accomplishment.

Today, things have changed no more paper boats, we are driven by the desires and realities and complications of life. They are never ending.

 Let’s, halt today for sometime, take a break from everything and make a paper boat. Write down that one wish you desperately want and sit and watch it sail . Feel the raindrops rather than cribbing about trip that got cancelled because of rains. The heavens have their own magical way to touch you. Just let them do it..!
I know this might sound a little stupid but if that paper boat can sail then trust me no matter what comes forward in life you will said through it too. Don’t end up making your entire life within the lines “once upon a time”.
Rains::Paper Boats::Feel the magic

I want to be a firefly 

We all have aspirations, dreams and ambitions to be someone or the other in our lives. Since, time immemorial this has been a legendary way of lifestyle that all of us follow till the time we die.Today, as I sit to write I know I have my own ambitions in life, dreams that are left to be fulfilled, there is so much that is a part of the ‘to do’ list; with that train of random thoughts running across my mind I came across something inventive at least that’s how I would phrase it .

“I WANT TO BE A FIREFLY” or as the call them the glowing worms or the lightning bulbs. I know that might sound absurd to anyone who is reading this right now but that is because they are better off than humans.

They are better off than humans who live partly rational, partly manipulative lives and most of all a life of darkness. ‘Darkness’ which is taking a toll over today in some or the other manner and one day we would be left with nothing. It’s all going to be a big black hole with no light.

I wonder what if I was a firefly even in those darkest places I would be the light. It’s not always necessary to be a legend rather sometimes it’s important to make sure that you don’t let your own light die.

Life is a four letter word that encompasses a whole range of possibilities and aspirations that last forever but forever is a very big word for the present let make sure that light doesn’t blow off. Not because you want to do something for someone rather because you don’t want to get lost in the world of darkness.

Be your own glowworm or light bulb or else the way I frame it be your own firefly. 



Writing has always been a playful activity  for me but sometimes we decide to take things seriously and here I am today making my debut as a writer with my novel “THE SHADOW OF THE DARK SOUL”.

Words have a magical quality in them and  have the power to bring the change we want to see in the world.

Admist the flurry of repitative rom-coms, here is a book of grit and substance that defies norms and stands on its own.This is a dedication to Jyoti Singh Pandey and to many others like her. Don’t let the fire of change die …!!

  The book is easily available on

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